Three hours, two different magnets, three doses of contrast dye.
Six days of agonizing waiting.
The vascular surgeon called this morning.
I want to be happy.
I want to be relived.
I want to be sure I believe he pored over the images on the disk and didn’t just read the report.
Unfortunately I can not be happy, or relieved, because there is pain. Lots of pain.
When I told Meghan about the conversation she got angry.
I don’t know how to help her except to keep pressing and pressing for answers.
At least she knows I believe her. I suppose that’s more than some kids in her boat have.
But still its hard.
There is no diagnosis.
There is pain.
She has work to do.
Writing is agonizing.
Swim practice certainly doesn’t help.
What do you do?
I can’t take away everything she loves.
I can’t absolve her of responsibilities – even when I know they cause pain.
I called the rheumatologist. For a small fee I sent her the CD too. It’s only money.
Maybe she will look harder.
I feel like I have been beaten up.
I spent the afternoon writing a letter to the corporate office about chronic inconvenient car problems.
Really I am tired of all this fighting.
Can’t we all just get along and do the right thing?
No words of wisdom today. Today we do it Dory’s way…