It just sounds better than 6 months. It feels better too.
“Six months” says, we are still a bit concerned.
A year says, “You got this. I’ll just check back and make sure it’s all good.”
One year from now I will visit the plastic surgeon. She will check on my fake boobs, and make sure they are still doing exactly what they are supposed to do. (Which near as I can figure is stay still.)
Next month I visit the breast surgeon. Hoping to get “one year” from her too.
Eventually my life and Meghan’s will be in some type of maintenance cycle. We still have some time before we get there, and there will always be doctor’s appointments – but for now it’s a big win.
Today after a few annoying things happened (like setting up Meghan’s appointment for Friday morning with the stupid surgeon, and fighting with a credit reporting agency over an old identity theft issue) I got to try on my new bathing suits.
Now, this (almost 39 year old) body, is in no condition to model, but I was so very excited I had to share.
Since the mastectomy I have had a lot of work getting used to my new boobs. They are smaller than the old ones, and that seems to be just as difficult to adjust to as if they had become bigger. It just changes everything – the way everything fits and feels.
I have also had to get used to no underwire – in anything. That has been an understandable, but difficult transition. So, I have pretty much transformed my closet into tops that worked for me. Lots of new T shirts, a couple of dress shirts that still need a tuck at the shoulder to tighten them up by the boobs. But all in all – its going ok.
When I first put on last years bathing suits I did cry a little. I had to immediately put all but 1 (which was salvageable, but not great) up in the attic. Not only did the boobs just not work in those suits, the stress of the last few months has taken off some pounds. So they were a mess. I ordered 1 suit a few weeks ago. My husband made me take it off because he said it made my boobs look fake. (LOL… newsflash honey… ) But I understood.
Got these in the mail today and got the seal of approval on both. I have some nerve showing them here… but I want to know what you think.
There are lots of things that I like about Saturdays. First, my husband is home with us, and that makes any day better. I love the routines – wash the sheets and towels and dog beds, head to the bank, general clean up, and the race to see how fast it can all get done so the day can start.
Perhaps what I love the best about Saturdays is that they are almost always free of doctors. Unless we are sick or have some kind of emergency, Saturday is a doctor – free day. That means no appointments, no waiting in offices, no waiting for phone calls that don’t come (UGH!), no dealing with billing offices and in and out of network nightmares. NO DOCTORS!
Have I mentioned I love Saturday?
And today it was even better. Beyond “normal,” we had a surprise visit from 2 nephews, all grown up now – 18 and 23 – who spent this really HOT day, swimming with us, and just hanging around to chat, play Kinect, and even Uno.
Kinect Adventures (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
We ate a delicious and healthy dinner. Grilled chicken on the barbecue, roasted potatoes, chick pea salad, and grilled zucchini from our garden! And, it was ALL prepared by my husband (who is incidentally a MUCH better cook than I will ever be!)
It gets better – if you can imagine. Today, for the first time since last summer, I put my new fake boobs, and my post hysterectomy body into a bathing suit – AND I SWAM! 🙂 And, it was ok. The suit fit. Everything stayed where it belonged. It looks like the hysterectomy has finally healed, and shhhhhhh…… even if it was just for today –
it was really nice to have a breath of normalcy in our lives!
“Don’t worry about a thing,
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right.
singin’: “Don’t worry about a thing,
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right!”
Rise up this mornin’,
Smiled with the risin’ sun,
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin’ sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true,
Sayin’, (“This is my message to you-ou-ou:”)
Singin’: “Don’t worry ’bout a thing,
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right.”
Singin’: “Don’t worry (don’t worry) ’bout a thing,
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right!”
Rise up this mornin’,
Smiled with the risin’ sun,
Three little birds
Pitch by my doorstep
Singin’ sweet songs
Of melodies pure and true,
Sayin’, “This is my message to you-ou-ou:”
Singin’: “Don’t worry about a thing, worry about a thing, oh!
Every little thing gonna be all right. Don’t worry!”
Singin’: “Don’t worry about a thing” – I won’t worry!
“‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right.”
Singin’: “Don’t worry about a thing,
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right” – I won’t worry!
Singin’: “Don’t worry about a thing,
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right.”
Singin’: “Don’t worry about a thing, oh no!
‘Cause every little thing gonna be all right!
Cocktail umbrella top (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
I can imagine sitting on the deck by the pool. Oh, wait – the surgeon hasn’t cleared me to swim. And, I still need a bathing suit.
The cute tankini I bought was vetoed by my husband who thinks it makes my boobs look fake. LMAO at the irony of that!
Well, at least I can imagine sitting on the deck with a strong cocktail in hand… working to convince myself that every little thing is gonna be all right.
My daughter’s much awaited appointment was today. The sonogram was at 1, and the doctor at 3:30.
The sonogram was thorough – took almost 45 minutes. The doctor reviewed the images, but could not give us a clear decision until he uploads the CD I brought with last September’s sonogram images for comparison.
For right now he said things looked good. There are MANY nodules, but most are smaller than one cm. He is content to keep watching every 6 months if he doesn’t find anything on comparison that warrants a closer look. Somewhere this has to be good news, although I am always afraid to get too relaxed, so I am waiting for the phone call.
What boggled me was how laid back he was about the puberty. He told me even though she won’t turn 9 until August and she has been developing a good 6 months, that it is not too early. He said to leave it alone. Apparently she and I are the only 2 concerned. I have been super upbeat about all the changes to her, but I can’t help it. In my belly it just feels WRONG.
Maybe I am just too used to worrying. And there are reasons for that. Its seems to be all we do. Sometimes good news gets to be harder to process because it comes so rarely. Sometimes it is almost odd to hear that things are “normal.”
So, we will wait for the phone call to confirm. Then we will table the thyroid issue till December.
Next up for my girl, MRI/MRA of her knee. June 28th.
For me, well, I need to find a dermatologist, someone to screen my kidneys, someone to follow the tumor on my spleen… oh, and I need a bathing suit. According to my dear husband, one that doesn’t make my (fake) boobs look fake.
And, a LARGE cocktail with a cute little umbrella, and some Bob Marley in the background…
beatingcowdens 